We often are clueless when our kids are throwing tantrums or acting very weird. The cause of these reactions can be the stress. Even children experience stress like their parents. But as parents, we should know what level of stress is bearable. What stress level needs alarm bell ringing and monitoring. Stress has a detrimental effect on the health of kids. So we should know what the main triggers of stress are. Even though it may sometimes look trivial to an adult, it is not so for kids. We must never forget that children have their struggles and also have to interact with the outside world. Here are the leading kid's stress buttons.
Quarrelling and fighting with their best friend. When a serious conflict occurs with their besties, they get upset, and stress develops. They are often unable to express their emotions. Anger follows which is a public outburst when they fail to handle the pressure. You can find it out by giving a patient hearing. Filing up the words and labelling the emotions of very young kids helps a lot. Always have some practical advice up in our sleeve and teach them how to move on.
Birth of a brother or sister. A lot of early preparations are required to adjust the older one with the inevitable changes and the sharing of the space and time when the baby arrives. However, hard you prepare the older kids the stress may build up upon the arrival of the sibling. Allocate times with your older children and make them feel being a proud sister or brother. The attention and the love the new baby attract from the other relatives, and social surrounding creates jealousy and stress of alienation. Be careful and remind them whenever you feel necessary.
Moving to a new school. In modern day work life, we often need to shift places for a better career prospect. Inevitably it means that the child has to changes school and along with it comes a disruption in their social network of friends at school and environment language and culture.The feeling of an outsider in a new school builds up stress. Attention should be given more during the settling process and be involved the integration process.
Bullying in school: Bullying of your child involves repeated physical, verbal or psychological attacks. Your child cannot usually defend him- or herself because of size or strength of the others. So the problems of refusal to go on the school bus or attend the class, bedwetting or preferring isolation. Take it as a serious issue and do get involved in sorting it out as it can cause permanent damage to a child's self-esteem.
A teacher who does not like you. When your child is singled out by the class teacher and subject to banter and criticism, it becomes stressful for your child. As school is an important fundamental part of growth and a child spends a considerable amount of time you have to be proactive to understand the problems for such behaviour. The stress may cause your child to stay away from school and even activities in the school. Necessary steps are required to bring down the stress level by hearing patiently and obviously having a discussion with the teacher along with your child. If improvement in the situation does not occur, do not hesitate to change the section or even school as soon possible.
Parent quarrelling and fighting. The stress of parents outbursts into arguments and fights. But parent's arguments usually don't mean that they don't love each, but kids fail to understand. They feel unprotected and apprehensive about the relationship. The children listen and observe how the parents resolve these fights and take important cues in their dealings of fighting or argument solving skill. The reflection of these stress are found immediately in studies or even in frequent mood swings.
Extended family quarrel (tiffs between parents and grandparents): In Indian culture, the difference of opinion builds up to a great extent because the concept of giving space to individuals is unimportant. Moreover, the quarrel often involves about the upbringing of the kids. The children caught in between the fights feel stressed out because they held themselves responsible for the arguments. They become a confused lot. Talk amicably and sort out the difference and wisely follow a middle path for the kids to enjoy the love all the family members. Also, explain to the kids the difference in simple language for them to grasp the situation.
Not having enough money and financial stress: The reasons of financial stress can be myriad. Laid off or loss of the main earning member of the family or even medical reason. Parents are more stressed out than usual and argue and worry about how to pay for things. It percolates to the child, and they are stressed out too. Parents have to be positive and prioritise and plan. It is important to educate your child of saving and financial planning as early as possible.
Taking a test. The Indian education system centres around the taking different test right from the school admission process to adult life of job interviews. The stress level is alarming, and often it leads to psychological breakdown and even suicidal thoughts and attempts. Be sensitive to your child mental development which will help them to handle stress in their grown-up live positively and boldly. The health issues and complications are irreparable if a child goes through constant stress. Find ways to relieve the stress through hobbies and do nurture them.
Overburdened schedule of children: Scheduling your child with enrichment activities is good, but the delicate balance should be there. Do not drag them into each activity. Make sure children have enough time with no activities, and similarly, parents also have time to spare and no specific goal in mind. It is the balance of “boring time” and “activity time” which is now is losing it grips.